I'm sure this is a topic many could debate.
My position is that you can’t make somebody change. You can inspire them to change. You can educate them towards change. You can support them in their change.
But you can’t make them change, not without some form of manipulation or coercion anyway. And we all know that when that happens it makes for a poor one-sided relationship.
Ultimately if a person is to change they have to decide to change, own the change and be responsibile for their actions.
Of course wanting to change also doen't mean that they can or will change. Why? Change can be hard, we have to take risks, give up the 'benefits' we get from not changing (like staying in our comfort zone, blaming others, etc.).
Successful change actually requires a lot from us, not just once but on an ongoing basis. You just have to look at losing weight or leaving your job of 5+ years to do something new somewhere else.
We have to believe we can, ask for the help we need, make sure when we change something we know the impact it might have on others, be motivated to get past the inevitable knock backs to persist and commit, be preapard, be clear on what we want, stretch ourselves and our thinking. And that is just a part of what it takes.
So when you want someone to change something about themselves think about what it is you can really do to help them - ask them what help they need, help them ask good questions, role model the behaviour you want, get them a coach, just don't manipulate or coerce them.